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Every day boy! I'm sorry it's come to this again. for whatever reason-we are back at square one million and negative. I'm not gonna blame it on you-and I'm not gonna blame it on me. We are at an impasse! I love ya boy! You're one of my very favorite people! You make me laugh like no other. You're brilliant! Funny! Clever! But I don't know how to stop loving you and start liking you-I don't know how to just be your friend. So I take the blame for the part of me that didn't know how to stop thinking that eventually ~ with all the times you came back to me ~ that you would start loving me too. It was easy for me to get butt hurt and to make up and excuses. And so, to ease my sadness, I would tease you for the way I hurt. But your anger and spite are just too much! (you would think I would know how to handle a Taurus! I have a ton of them in my life! I guess the difference is I've mostly known girls! Taurus men are hard to understand! I get that you guys are -but !!) I've thought about you practiy every married women seeking sex tonight Kennesawday since Dec 2 my sweet boy and I've missed you practiy every single one of those days, and every time you come back, it's my very favorite day! But I can't continue to be . I can't continue to hope. I can't continue to be defeated. I wish so badly we had just been friends and never lovers! (that changed everything for me! and you were such a fun friend! such a good guy!) I've never wished ill on you, even through all your dishonesty. I don't wish ill on you now. I truly madly deeply just wish for you to be happy and for you to be content. I'm sorry we can't be friends!! I'm sorry I can't be at the level you are. I'm sorry you can't understand my hurt and my frustration and my sadness and I'm sorry we can't communicate to each other what we truly want and need to say. I've been so hurt and so down so many times over the last few years. my guard is up, my walls are high, and my resolve is non existent. I'm sorry you are so angry and in such a dark place that you feel you need to me hurtful and pejorative names! It's ok-that helps with the separation and to cut , for you and for me. Truly sweet boy I be well. Do you boo! Do you! I feel grateful you thought of me again-I'm glad to be your light when you were feeling dark. I'm glad you contacted me again and I'm happy to know that we were friends. I'm not now. I'm relieved to NOT be anymore! I've cried a lot the last little while and this has reminded me that I need to be more respectful to myself. Goodbye my darling boy!